GUILTY VIEWING PLEASURES
Never Too Young To Die (1986)
Info:
- Release Date: June 13, 1986
- Creators: Gil Bettman (director), Steven Paul (writer)
- Genre: Teen Spies
- Rating: ★★★★☆
Plot:
- Flamboyant hermaphrodite Velvet Von Ragner wants to poison the Diablo Canyon water supply, but lost the floppy disk containing the evil plans. Enter college gymnast Lance Stargrove, his brainy roommate Cliff, and gorgeous spy Danja to find the disk and try to keep it away from Ragner.
Notes:
- Stargrove's theme song! ("Stargrove, flying like you've never flown...")
- Ragner, reminding me of an evil cross between Divine and Dr. Frank-n-Furter
- Carousel horse motorcycles in the biker bar
- Ragner autographing a photo with a super-deadly fingernail dipped in ink
- Danja can drive her car completely under a semi but isn't able to see silver spikes in the road?
- The muffin tin full of various drugs at Ragner's hideout
- "Fork over some RAM-K bitch, or we'll tenderize your butt"
- "Trade a wet kiss for this?"
- "I need to borrow your bike. You probably won't see it again"
- "Once it's been programmed, you can't deprogram it. Don't you read spy novels?"
- "You can do nasty things and they never come back to you. You're never too young to die"
Cast:
- John Stamos as Lance Stargrove
- Gene Simmons as Ragner
- Vanity as Danja
- Peter Kwong as Cliff
- George Lazenby as Stargrove
- Ed Brock as Pyramid
- Robert Englund as Riley
Links Away: